I'm Pam Newman.

I am awesome every day & you are too.

Ask me!

Follow my butt on Twitter!

I'm a writer of aricles, poems & songs. Here's some cool stuff I wrote.

Aside from the fact that I’m not a buttlicker, I’m a liberal.

Pam

Context not required.

(via kelsium)

rockawkwardly:

since I’m already posting music meme ish stuff

ahaha

rockawkwardly:

since I’m already posting music meme ish stuff

ahaha

it turns into a screaming, swollen cat anus.

Rosa on shaving her armpits.

fatcatsonwallstreet:

Fat Cat smokes cigar with Gordon Gekko, not worried at all.
Thanks for the submission, thesarahshow!

Shit, this one is really good, though!

fatcatsonwallstreet:

Fat Cat smokes cigar with Gordon Gekko, not worried at all.

Thanks for the submission, thesarahshow!

Shit, this one is really good, though!

fuckinginappropriate:

This pretty much expresses how I feel.

fuckinginappropriate:

This pretty much expresses how I feel.

awesome-everyday:

Butter and Hams (Bad Romance Parody, Paula Dean style) - Pam Newman

I want your butter, your butter and hams!
You and me could eat some candied yams

Wooooahhh ooooh

I want your butter, your butter and hams!
You and me could eat some candied yams

Wooooahhh ooooh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh

I want to lick the spoon and pan

Wooooahhh ooooh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh

Fried in your butter dance

Ah ah ha ha, Ya’ll! Ah ah ha ha y’all! Ah ha Paula, y’all, want butter & hams.

Full lyrics here

Image via

I totally forgot that this existed!

So my twitter gurl, @PolaRoid_Rage (AKA Martiza Lugo) does illustrations for HelloGiggles.com.
Well, she used one of my lol’able @pamsbutt tweets as the Illustrated Tweet of the Day on HGigs!
You can see her illustration of my tweet here.

So my twitter gurl, @PolaRoid_Rage (AKA Martiza Lugo) does illustrations for HelloGiggles.com.

Well, she used one of my lol’able @pamsbutt tweets as the Illustrated Tweet of the Day on HGigs!

You can see her illustration of my tweet here.

I broke my wine corkscrew a few weeks ago

So I had stopped buying wine and said to myself, “The next time I buy wine, I HAVE to buy a corkscrew.”

Well, yesterday I bought wine, and of course I forgot to buy a corkscrew.

Last night I opened a bottle using the screwdriver method (Push the cork into the bottle) and it worked just fine.

Tonight? I pushed the cork into the bottle and it sprayed all over my face, glasses, shirt and hair like I was in a goddamn rap video.

rand0mflora:

Ha!

Not gonna say I just did this while pretending my android was a purple dragon egg.
Nope.  

rand0mflora:

Ha!

Not gonna say I just did this while pretending my android was a purple dragon egg.

Nope.  

GPOYW

GPOYW