I'm Pam Newman.

I am awesome every day & you are too.

Ask me!

Follow my butt on Twitter!

I'm a writer of aricles, poems & songs. Here's some cool stuff I wrote.

How to Win The Much Desired Favor of Miss Pamela Jean Newman:
Be this product.

How to Win The Much Desired Favor of Miss Pamela Jean Newman:

Be this product.

Beyonce - Love On Top

Janelle Monae - Cold War

Europe - The Final Countdown

I really Like this song a lot.

Like, maybe I like it a little too much.

When I hear the intro, no matter where I am, it pavlov bells me or some shit and I’m hooting like an underage girl at a bar who hears her favorite song over the PA system. 

This song is so fucking badass. It erupts from the low end with sounds that could be an effect associated with someone in moon-bouncy shoes, or a flatulent cow. Then it leaves the listener wondering, is this the theme song to Rocky Balboa In Space? Then this crazy hair metal band with a one-word name produces an interstellar epic love ballad over some fake-ass horn synth sound in a melody that sounds a lot like some European Royal’s entrance theme to the WWE. 

Like, this song is so spectacular that when I hear it, I imagine myself in space, headed to Venus. The stars swim past me like when the Star Trek: The Next Generation Enterprise would hit warp 9. 

BAM!

Kickass chorus!

BAM!

BITCHIN EIGHTIES GUITAR SOLO!

BAH-BAYUM!

High ass notes!

BAM!

This song is pretty fucking rad, you guys.

Pam’s Favorite Things: Bolthouse Farms Perfectly Protein Mocha Cappuccino
I’ve got blood sugar issues or something, because I turn into a  complete and utter Bitchy McCuntface von Fuckyomama when I’m hungry. I’m  not diagnosed with anything, but I know I get passy-outy if I haven’t  eaten enough.
I really am sensitive.
Anyway, breakfast & lunch haven’t happened today. I’ve been so  busy getting ready for my trip to the Afro Punk festival in Brooklyn  that food took a side burner to well, everything. This Bolthouse Farms  Mocha Cappuccino stuff may have saved my life. It’s the shiit, with an  extra “i” for incredible!
I have been a fan of the Bolthouse Farms mocha for a long time. It’s a  little expensive, but that’s because it’s a couple of (REALLY FUCKING  DELICIOUS) meals in a bottle. When it’s not on sale it usually costs  like 4 bucks for the 1qt bottle. That’s less than a Venti anything from  Starbucks and has no fake shit in it. I also promise this has less  calories per serving, and is better for you than anything this size at  Starbucks.
This motha’ has more than 100% daily servings of Vitamin c, vitamin  b12 and vitamin b6. All shit that I need when I’m starting to see the  hunger stars. It also 8 grams of protien per serving, which is enough to  take me from Miss McCuntface von Fuckyomama to the laughing,  joke-telling goof ball everyone is so fond of.
These people need to give me a sponsorship deal.

Pam’s Favorite Things: Bolthouse Farms Perfectly Protein Mocha Cappuccino

I’ve got blood sugar issues or something, because I turn into a complete and utter Bitchy McCuntface von Fuckyomama when I’m hungry. I’m not diagnosed with anything, but I know I get passy-outy if I haven’t eaten enough.

I really am sensitive.

Anyway, breakfast & lunch haven’t happened today. I’ve been so busy getting ready for my trip to the Afro Punk festival in Brooklyn that food took a side burner to well, everything. This Bolthouse Farms Mocha Cappuccino stuff may have saved my life. It’s the shiit, with an extra “i” for incredible!

I have been a fan of the Bolthouse Farms mocha for a long time. It’s a little expensive, but that’s because it’s a couple of (REALLY FUCKING DELICIOUS) meals in a bottle. When it’s not on sale it usually costs like 4 bucks for the 1qt bottle. That’s less than a Venti anything from Starbucks and has no fake shit in it. I also promise this has less calories per serving, and is better for you than anything this size at Starbucks.

This motha’ has more than 100% daily servings of Vitamin c, vitamin b12 and vitamin b6. All shit that I need when I’m starting to see the hunger stars. It also 8 grams of protien per serving, which is enough to take me from Miss McCuntface von Fuckyomama to the laughing, joke-telling goof ball everyone is so fond of.

These people need to give me a sponsorship deal.

sailorswayze:

Meg’s Top 20 Favorite Movies // 14. The Fifth Element (1997, Luc Besson)

Negative, I am a meat popsicle.

I LOVE THE FIFTH ELEMENT YOU GUYS. AW SHIT YEAH.

How to Win the Much Desired Favor of Pamela Jean Newman:
Get me some fro-yo, yo. Seriously, you guys… DOESN’T THAT LOOK AWESOME?
I have been craving frozen yogurt since the last time I ate frozen yogurt. My craving requires immediate satisfaction or I might start hallucinating and end up slicing bananas on to shaving cream.

How to Win the Much Desired Favor of Pamela Jean Newman:

Get me some fro-yo, yo. Seriously, you guys… DOESN’T THAT LOOK AWESOME?

I have been craving frozen yogurt since the last time I ate frozen yogurt. My craving requires immediate satisfaction or I might start hallucinating and end up slicing bananas on to shaving cream.

Shakira - The Day and the Time

bestrooftalkever:

Amy Winehouse - “Back To Black”

This is my favorite song on that album.

I haven’t said anything personal about Amy Winehouse since I saw Rolling Stone post about her death. That’s because I was so shocked. I read the words and they didn’t feel real until I saw it was from a legit source. I felt pins and needles in my fingers. I felt like I lost a co-worker, a friend or a neighbor.

This album got me through a weird transition in my life. I’d recently moved to a new place and lost a job I thought was very important to my life. I had just dumped an obnoxious douchebag and started drinking sweet wines, teaching myself French and smoking clove cigarettes.

It was a weird time.

Amy’s songs blaring through my car stereo helped ease that transiton. Honestly, I laid on the floor in my apartment and yell-sang this song while drinking honey meade more times than my remaining brain cells can remember.

I was really looking forward to seeing Amy make a magical and transformative comeback from adversity like I did while rocking this song at 11. I guess her comeback is to a different metephysical place than mine was.

Amy, you are missed. Tell Michael I said hi.

PAM’S TOP STUFF OF A DESIGNATED PERIOD OF TIME

  • Functional Air Conditioning
  • Janelle Monae’s uncanny wisdom
  • Righteous Dames: Marianna, Kelly, Flora, Myrna, Audrey, Leanette (Who’s in the Dominican Republic, omg pass the jelly). Any number of extremely fly femmes named Jessica, and believe it or not, My Mom. You.
  • Music: listening to it, performing it, making it, sharing it, learning how to use all these crazy apps (google music, spotify, turntable.fm, grooveshark) to organize it.
  • Dedication to working out and eating better. I can do a rep of about 40 situps without wanting to throwup.
  • People who give me money in exchange for writing stuff.
  • People who take the money I got in exchange for writing stuff and turn it into frozen yogurt and tacos.
  • Everything that Betty Draper wears in Mad Men season 1

No Doubt - Just A Girl

beautylish:

Kate Spade has entered the makeup arena, creating a collection of lipsticks called Supercalifragilipstick - a mix of lipstick, lip balm and lip gloss in one! Which shade will you beauties be trying out?

HOW AM I JUST NOW FINDING OUT ABOUT THIS?
Supercalifragilipstick? GENIUS. I love Kate Spade so much. I want to live in their ads.
Here’s hoping I find some shades that work with my skin tone in that tab I just opened.

beautylish:

Kate Spade has entered the makeup arena, creating a collection of lipsticks called Supercalifragilipstick - a mix of lipstick, lip balm and lip gloss in one! Which shade will you beauties be trying out?

HOW AM I JUST NOW FINDING OUT ABOUT THIS?

Supercalifragilipstick? GENIUS. I love Kate Spade so much. I want to live in their ads.

Here’s hoping I find some shades that work with my skin tone in that tab I just opened.

Santa Esmeralda - Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood

(Source: bitchmyland)